Back-to-school jokes – English Goes Global

How can you make seven even? „By taking away the S.“
How can you make sure you get straight As? „Use a ruler.“
What did the triangle say to the circle? „You’re pointless.“
What do teachers do at the beach? „Test the water.“
What is blue and not heavy? „Light blue.“
What is the snake’s favourite subject? „Hissssstory.“
What is why when it’s dirty and black when it’s clean? „A blackboard.“ [Now that’s outdated!]
What kind of meals do maths teacher’s eat? „Square meals.“
What kind of school do giants go to? „High school.“
What time would it be if T-Rex came to school? „Time to run“
What will happen if you swallow a book of synonyms? „You’ll get thesaurus throat you ever had.“
What’s a maths teacher’s favourite dessert? „Pi.“
Who’s in charge of the pencil case? „The ruler.“
Why did the dog do so well at school? „Because he was the teacher’s pet.“
Why did the echo get a detentions? „For answering back, back, back.“
Why did the kids eat their homework? „Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.“
Why did the music teacher have a ladder? „To reach the high notes.“
Why did the student throw her watch out the window? „To see time fly.“
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses in class? „She had really bright students.“
Why was the maths book sad? „It had too many problems.“